HOW TO PREPARE FOR/ SAVE YOUR MARRIAGE
Whether you are already married or are looking to get married, there are things you should do to be successful at it.
HAVE REALISTIC EXPECTATIONS.
If there’s one thing many people are struggling with in relationships and marriages it is having unrealistic expectations. Many tend to have a fairytale expectation of how a marriage should be, and forget that the vows say “in good and bad times”. And there will be bad times. It is easy to get along when there are good times or when the love is new and fresh. It’s the ability and willingness to press through those hard times after those first loving feelings has faded, that determines the success or the failure of the marriage.
BE WILLING TO SACRIFICE, COMPROMISE AND COOPERATE.
When you are in a relationship or a marriage you will have to sacrifice compromise and cooperate to be able to have success. If it’s always my way or the highway all the time by either one or both parts in the relationship, it will be difficult to cooperate in creating a happy marriage that will last. Be willing to sacrifice your wishes for your partner, it shouldn’t always be about what you want to have or what you want to do. Allow your partner to choose that movie for once, or to choose that restaurant or choose that vacation. And your partner should do the same for you. If you are willing to humble yourself for each other and cooperate in making choices, it will make the relationship more pleasing to be in.
APOLOGIZE AND FORGIVE
The missing sentences in many marriages today are: “I am sorry, I apologize, I was wrong, forgive me, I forgive you, I understand, I am listening.”
If people brought these sentences into their marriages and relationships more often it would be easier to get along and move on and get over difficulties.
When your partner makes a mistake forgive. When you make a mistake, apologize and ask for forgiveness. When your partner is wrong about something don’t say “I told you so” Say that you understand and that it is okay to be wrong, and that it is okay to make mistakes.
Be able to forgive yourself as well when you have done something wrong in the marriage is also important.
BE HUMBLE AND PUT THE EGO ASIDE
It means that you change your mind and thinking from:
“ What about me, what can you do for me, how can you make me happy” kind of thinking, to a:
“What can I do to serve you and make you happy, and to make your day better?” kind of thinking.
It means that your partner’s happiness means more to you than your own happiness. It means that seeing the other person happy, makes you happy.
It doesn’t mean that you are suppose to be a doormat and always do what the other person wants and never think of yourself, but it means to sacrifice some of your own wishes and wants at times to keep the marriage good.
BE HAPPY WITH OR WITHOUT THE OTHER PERSON
If you are able to stay calm, cool and happy when the person you love isn’t around, then you have the basic, necessary foundation for a happy and successful marriage. It means that You are able to be happy when: your partner goes to play baseball, soccer or golf or any kind of sport or decides to hang out with the guys instead of spending a romantic evening with you. It means that You are able to stay happy when your partner goes on shopping with her girlfriends, or to the spa or out to dance or on a vacation without you.
It means that you are able to stay happy regardless of what the other person are doing or are not doing. It means that you are not offended when your partner chooses to do something else but to be with you all the time.
It means that you don’t expect the other person or gives him/her the responsibility to make and keep you happy. But you understand that you are responsible for your own happiness.
If you want a happy, stable marriage, YOU first of all have to be happy and stable in good times and bad times, when things go your way and doesn’t go your way.
If you keep this in mind before you marry or while you are married YOU GOT THE KEYS TO SUCCESS.
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